How to Excavate a Heart

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Let me reiterate: Shani, who we’ve been told reveres the field of palaeontology and for whom this internship is a dream-come-true throws priceless artefacts in the trash… Personally, if I were her manager, I would’ve been convicted of murder after that. As someone who had a huge (huge!) palaeontology and dinosaur obsession throughout my life and who did minor studies in the field during my time at university, I could not imagine liking someone so much that I throw fossils —literal million year-old artefacts that have ground-breaking scientific potential— in the bin, even if it were an accident. Representation of queer women who are sexually assaulted by other queer women is important because it’s a topic that’s scarcely spoken of. However, ‘How to Excavate a Heart ‘ does not deal with this issue in a mature, nuanced or sensitive manner at all. If anything, it felt little more like a means to an end, a plot point to be whipped out at the very end to excuse the main character’s bad personality and then brushed over. I love it for being a sapphic Jewish holiday romance, but the actual execution was middling to low.

Add that to the fact that I did not care for May's character at all. She seems rude and insulting to Shani and apparently to everyone else. Her relationship with her dad is sort of magically fast-forward resolved and the conflicts seem a bit artificial because literally all that is needed is communication of any kind. The primary character arc as I saw it was about Shani learning to be her own person, independent of a best friend or girlfriend, but this is glossed over in the resolution as well so I'm not sure what the takeaway was.Full disclosure, close to the end there was a triggering part so I skimmed past that. I had recently read RUMOR GAMES and had to DNF close to the end for a similar reason and just didn't want to do it again. So do be aware of trigger warnings before going into this (the author also provides trigger warnings.)

I received this book for free from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review. ❃ Shani is a relatable main character, and I loved her voice. She has just finished her first semester of university, and the author does can excellent job capturing all the feelings of starting this new phase of one’s life. What I especially enjoyed about Shani is the way she makes mistakes as she navigates all the changes in her life. This makes her realistic, and through some of her messier moments, she is able to grow. ❀ Complex Relationships As this is YA, I do want to bring attention to the trigger warning. It’s there for sexual assault so beware of that before reading this. hmm, okay. this is probably pretty solidly in the 3.5 stars camp, for me. overall, i would rec it, but it wasn't quite what i thought it was going to be? i think the 'enemies to lovers' isn't rlly accurate despite the way the main characters meet, it didn't rlly feel like it fits that trope. equally, i don't think this is a romcom. it's not rlly funny, it's def more of a character study/coming of age. a romance≠romcom, and i feel like a lot of marketing (esp with the more mainstream publishers) seem to just slap romcom onto anything with romance. i was also under the impression (based on the characters being freshmen in college) that this was more NA and less YA, so i had to adjust my expecations abt what the book was, a little. i think if those things were a little more upfront in the marketing, then i would have enjoyed it a little more, just bc there were adjustments being made while reading. this is arlow's debut, and i think they nailed it. it's YA in a wholesome way that made me root for shani's growth, rather than be annoyed by her immaturity. the drama is balanced with witty chapter titles, funny banter, corgi cuteness, facts about fish, and more. i love the side characters, especially hilarious and often-inappropriate elderly beatrice, cool queer mentor mandira, shani's sweet rejected-yet-relaiable mom, and dopey pup raphael.

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The book reveals at around the 80% mark that part of the reason Shani has unresolved trauma from her break-up with her ex-girlfriend is because said ex-girlfriend sexually assaulted her. Actually, pathetic doesn’t even begin to describe Shani. The reason she is not with her mother for the holiday season (which a major point of conflict throughout the book) is because she is so desperate to follow through on her internship. The book tells us again and again that Shani is ultra, super passionate about palaeontology. That being said, the moment her romance with May begins to develop, Shani stops caring about her internship. It gets so bad and she becomes so distracted by this fledgling romance that throws priceless, scientifically ground-breaking fossils in the bin. Frankly I could just write “there is a corgi who wears booties” as the review and that would justify the rating, but I figure since this is an arc review I ought to give a bit more.

There are several side characters from Beatrice, the 96-year-old, that Shani is staying with to Taylor, Shani’s best friend. They helped with bringing other parts of Shani’s personality out that wasn’t always shown with her inner dialogue’s. Raphael, the corgi Shani dog walks, was a very pleasant bonus. As a dog lover, I thought his scenes added to the light-heartedness to the story. In the end, if you want a cute and sweet YA sapphic holiday romance, that stays mostly on the surface, and doesn’t dig too deep, this might be the book for you. While I found that I could not get into the romance, as it didn’t feel deep enough for me, it is explained later in the book why it was done that way, so I found other scenes I enjoyed more. I think the museum scenes were my favorite parts, and clearly done with the author’s love, and they reminded me how much I miss them since I haven’t seen any since the pandemic hit. I also fell in love with one of the cutest dogs ever. This wasn’t the book I was looking for, but it still had some nice moments and I expect that readers looking for a sweet YA holiday romance will enjoy this more than I did.

It also contained instances of (past) sexual assault and a controlling/abusive relationship, and that was one of the things that were well done.

This is a book that heavily features bodies, poop, and anxiety relating to those things. If you are sensitive to those topics, please take note and care. Kelly Quindlen meets Casey McQuiston in this sapphic Jewish twist on the classic Christmas enemies-to-lovers rom-com, as college freshman Shani’s internship is interrupted by a whirlwind winter fling. The Year My Life Went down the toilet is queer, Jewish, and chronically ill--three things I never thought I'd be able to combine in a book. Stonewall Honor author Jake Maia Arlow delivers a sapphic Jewish twist on the classic Christmas rom-com in a read perfect for fans of Kelly Quindlen and Casey McQuiston. This is my second middle grade novel, and the first one with chronically ill characters. The entire main cast is both queer and chronically ill (they all have IBD). I was diagnosed with Crohn's when I was the same age as Al, our protagonist. I didn't have other people to talk to about my disease, and it felt embarrassing to have a chronic illness based almost entirely around the toilet.Ultimately, I’m really disappointed with this book. It had so much potential to be a great sapphic, Jewish romance that pushes against stereotypes and tells a nuanced story of growing up, becoming independent and uncovering who you are outside the pretences of relationships. Sadly, it wasn’t even close to that. I really wish I could give this a higher rating, but due to the insensitive and needless portray of sexual assault, I really don’t feel comfortable giving this anything higher. If Shani’s trauma had been a key component of the story and her journey to dealing with her trauma was a main plot point of the book then perhaps my rating would be different. Instead, sexual assault is used in ‘How to Excavate a Heart’ as a ungraceful, forced conflict between Shani and various other characters and never gets properly discussed. Only once is the experience actually called sexual assault and, again, this happens very late into the book. The treatment of the topic in this book really made me question whether or not sensitivity readers were brought in to give notes on the representation of sexual assault. I truly cannot conceive of how this ham-fisted inclusion made it into a traditionally published novel. Shani Levine has just been dumped when her winter break starts and she is about to begin her month-long internship at the Smithsonian. She’s decided to keep her head down and concentrate on her internship when she quite literally runs into May. She meets May again when she takes a dog-walking gig and May happens to be the dog owner’s daughter. The two have a strong dislike for one another but it isn’t long before their feelings start to change. There's a way to write trauma-related outbursts, sexual assault storyline’s and relationship issues, but this isn't it. I don't believe the storyline or its ramifications were well executed at all. Sexual assault is hard to write about and have conversations about in general, but even more so when the book is attempting to be a feel-good, lighthearted teenage romance and keeping everything surface level. It really does a disservice to such an important topic. If you’re going to include healing from sexual abuse trauma in a romance novel, introducing this facet of the characters experiences must happen prior to the 80% mark and can���t be used as a pseudo plot-twist.(Note: While the book references Shani’s discomfort over being sexually intimate a few times, it only reveals the reason behind this quite late into the book.) Stars. This was a very cute holiday romance, but it wasn’t what I was expecting to read. I’ll go into the whys more but overall; I still thought the story was very sweet and cute and I enjoyed the read for the most part. The holidays don’t play as big of a role as I expected, and in the book the characters celebrate New Years so reading the book now, as of writing this review, would fit perfectly.